(WellnessPursuits.com) – Emotional Strength (ES) is not about intelligence. It’s about courage, perseverance, flexibility, and personal power. Good and bad stuff happens to everyone. What you do about “what happened” defines how strong your (ES) really is.
So, why do we care if we’re strong emotionally? The stronger your (ES), the happier your life will be. If you ask any person, a friend or a random stranger if they want a happy or unhappy life, they will invariably say “happy.” Since (ES) is a requirement for a happy life, I’d say it’s a pretty important idea to fully understand.
The good news is that even if you developed some habits in the past that have been preventing you from having the happy life you want, you can start fresh today. The hard to do news is you have to first accept that whatever has happened in your life so far cannot be changed and is in the past.
If you can do that… not forget what happened, but instead replace the destructive habit of reliving the past with some new things to do and look forward to… then you’re on your way.
Rather than tell you what to do to have a good supply of (ES), it seems more effective to tell you what not to do. It’s destructive habits that keep both your (ES) and your happiness level down.
Take The Test
The test below is a list of 10 things not to do – it’s a test of your current Emotional Strength (ES). You may find yourself recognizing that you do some of them. The lower the number of things you do on the list, the higher your (ES). You will build your (ES) and have a happier life by deciding to stop doing any one or more of them.
People Who Are Emotionally Strong:
1. Don’t feel sorry for themselves for very long
2. Don’t let other people’s actions dictate how they feel
3. Don’t obsess about things that they can’t control
4. Don’t try to please everyone
5. Don’t keep rehashing the past
6. Don’t resent when someone else is successful
7. Don’t give up
8. Don’t expect immediate results — They have patience
9. Don’t mind being alone
10. Don’t think they’re owed or entitled to things
So, how did you score? A score of 3 or fewer on the list, means you’re probably pretty happy and your ES level is high.
If you score between 4 and 6 of things you do on the list of “don’ts,” you have some things to consider. Are you willing to change the way you think about any of the things on the list that you do? Can you believe that a happy life does not necessarily mean an easy life? Can you believe that you can endure many, many difficult and tragic events and still have a good life? Can you believe that happiness and a good life belong to people who have a high level of (ES)?
If so, you can have a higher (ES) too and raise your level of happiness considerably.
A score of 7 or higher means you have a very difficult time handling lifes ups and downs. You may need some help to navigate your way back to a better outlook. Please talk to your doctor, a mental health counselor, or your spiritual or religious leader for guidance that can help you.
The test above is an excellent check-list to determine your current (ES). It’s also a really good gauge of how happy you are. Dump any of the negative 10 “not to do” habits on the list and your happiness in life will rise along with your (ES).
Ok. It takes a conscious decision to change a habit, but you can start today. If you want to dump any of the 10, consciously decide to.
If having a happier life is important to you, you now have a check-list of what not to do. If you stop doing the stuff on the check-list, you’ll have time and energy to do the stuff that creates a sense of acceptance, peace and happiness. You can do it. It’s your life, and a high level of Emotional Strength (ES) will give you a full sense of your infinite worth and value.
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