(WellnessPursuits) – Attraction is a complicated beast. Sure, a hot bod and pretty face might have a lot of guys turning their heads, but good looks can only get a woman so far. When it comes to finding a long-term partner, most men are looking for more than physical beauty, so stop fretting over looking perfect and consider these 10 other traits men want in their women (and, honestly, that women want in men, too).
Relationships are founded on trust. We all need someone we can show our vulnerable side to and still feel safe around, and men are no exception. One study polled college students to see what they looked for in a long-term partner, and even the men weighted honesty over physical characteristics. And if hormone-fueled college guys are looking for honesty in their relationships, then it’s a safe bet that honesty is probably a priority to most other men as well.
A relationship can’t have honesty without compassion. Men want someone who can offer a sympathetic ear or an encouraging word during dark times. A kind woman is more likely to be a supportive companion and caring parent — put simply, a compassionate person is good long-term relationship material.
There’s something to be said about the sexy librarian stereotype, so forget playing the ditzy blonde and crack open a book. Men find smart women attractive, and most of them seek out intelligence when looking for a long-term partner. Some men even find intelligence to be a physical turn-on.
Men want independent women who have lives that extend beyond them. They want to be able to do their own thing sometimes, without the stress of having someone attached to the hip or feeling woefully left out. It’s important to have your own hobbies, interests and life outside of your relationship. Independent women are also more likely to be strong and secure, which are other qualities most men seek in a long-term partner.
According to Today, most men are attracted to women who know how to be sexy without being slutty. A conservative, form-fitting blouse can be more of a turn-on than a cheap, leather miniskirt — and the former sends a message that you are to be respected just as much as desired.
6. A Positive Attitude
You know the old saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”? Well, it holds true when it comes to attracting men. Attitude can make the difference between a fun and engaging night out and a soul-sapping energy drain. Attitude is so important. Even a smile can make you look more attractive.
7. Fun Interests
Guys like interesting gals, so share your interests. What do you enjoy that might set you apart? According to a Shape poll, men find it most attractive when women enjoy playing sports, like to take spontaneous road trips or have musical or artistic pursuits. Dancers and women who wear unique clothing or hairstyles were also highly rated.
8. A Good Sense of Humor
That Shape poll also revealed that men are attracted to women with wit. Cosmopolitan shares that a dark or dirty sense of humor can be especially appealing. Find a way to make him laugh, and he’ll find you that much more attractive.
9. Hold The Drama
Men aren’t looking to add drama into their lives. Most want someone who will complement their personality, a partner who knows how to be reasonable and sensible and who won’t start arguments over petty things. And when they do argue, they don’t resort to low blows. Shape found that men seek out women who can argue without criticizing or getting defensive.
Men want to connect on a deeper level just as much as women, even if their brains can sometimes get lost in their pants. They want to be with someone who has substance to her personality, someone who can engage his mind and his body. There’s much more to compatibility than sex, and excitement in the bedroom will only hold his interest for so long if that’s all you have to offer.
How you look to a man goes well beyond the appearance of your face or shape of your body. Who you are on the inside shines through, and those qualities can be more attractive than anything physical. What’s most important is that you be you — and the right person will see the beauty in that.
~Here’s to Your Healthy Pursuits!
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